WeatheredRockSunset

Sometimes ... well, these days rather, I wonder what I am doing in my life.

This year has been a blizzard of things, yet somehow it feels like It has just crept by slowly like a snail or a slug - slugging on.

I don't really understand what changes are happening, or where my path lies. It just is, and I live through it on a daily basis.

My mind wanders aimlessly throughout the days, and although certain things happen, its not so monumental as to rock my world - most of the time. Often, I find myself enclosed by four bland walls at the end the day, waiting for somebody to come online on Skype. But when that person comes, sometimes I find myself at a loss of words.

I wonder if this is feeling is a lack of happiness. Sure enough, I've never felt really HAPPY over the past few months. I just exist to exist, and that is all there is. I work to provide, I live so that I may one day go home.

There is no happiness.

I guess that is it.

While I do find pleasure in some day-to-day experiences, and at times at night. But these bland walls haunt me.

I miss that soaring feeling. That certain kind of high whenever my special someone is around. I miss hugs. I miss all out laughter. I miss the feeling of freedom.

But I cannot tell others that. It would seem weird.

Then again. I am weird.

Sigh.

[BookWorm] Review: The Mark of Athena

So I wrote an entry about Pchum Ben which happened for the past three days, but I forgot to post it, so that's going into the trash bin.

I had a lot of things to do during the long Pchum Ben holiday (not really) but I only managed to finish a few of those goals because half of the time was spent sleeping (curse you Decolgen Forte!). But one thing's for sure, I did finish reading The Mark of Athena by Rick Riordan. It was my ultimate goal, and I was able to complete it. BooYah!

Quick Summary:

Basically, the story picks up right where we left off at the end of 'The Son of Neptune'. They board the Argo II, and then head off to their new adventures. They have their quests, of course, and one of which is a quest that the offspring of Athena must do alone. By the end of the book, they pretty much complete their quests - as usual. 

(I know, I suck at making summaries, but I don't want to write spoilers, too.)

Review:

I give it - **** (4 Stars)

Personally, I've grown attached to Percy Jackson. This book does not give me so much of that 'Percy-time' that I was waiting for, but at least there are some parts. However, I do get that the series is about 'The Heroes of Olympus' and no longer 'Percy Jackson and the...' so I got over the lack of 'Percy-time'. BUT I STILL WANT IT.

Also, there were too many voices in my head. Hard to follow a certain voice... sort of. LOL

And then there was the grown up part. I get it... characters grow up, too. I wish they did not have to grow up though. But I totally respect that. They deal with love now.. ick. And unfortunately, Riordan just had to remind me constantly that they were kissing and kissing and worrying about their partners. It throws them off focus, yo! But I guess that only makes them more human. 

Based on the cover, I predicted that there would be some kind of tension between Jason and Percy. Although Percy is a reluctant leader of sorts and Jason was trained to lead, I still felt there would be some kind of tension between them. There is tension, but not what I expected. I did feel like Jason was shoved to a corner. I like it! Hahaha

There are so many things going on in this book, and because it is just one book with so many things, I feel that these would have been better if they were explored more. Not just as a few snippets or flashes of what happened. I would have loved to read about the several battles that happened but did were not described. And I would have loved to learn about how several of the demigods escaped certain situations but was directed to the other drama happening on the other end. Also, I would have preferred if they were battling out, like the crazy fight that happened when Percy fought with the Titans. 

But that's just me.

Still, I will be waiting for the next book. Too bad I have to wait for another year.

I also cannot wait to start reading the Norse mythology books!!

Go and read The Mark of Athena and see for yourself.

[Artsy Fartsy & Stuff]: Picking up the pen(cil)

Well, I haven't exactly drawn much these days... apart from your everyday doodles, that is.

Nope.

I left my heart and soul in ... the Philippines. LOL I left my crayons, pens, pastels, etc. in a small box that is probably gathering more dust than the desert.

I've never really stopped drawing this and that on the sides and certain sheets of my notebook at work, and today, I've decided to give it a try. Again.

This is what I managed to create today. It is a 'Work in Progress' or WIP.

Its not much.

FYI, I totally suck at drawing humans, and I think this is the first time it turned out at least acceptable (for me).

Yes, I am aware that this is the initial sketch. LOL My friend Rhardo over at Deviantart posts stuff like these.

The initial sketch then shows the progress.

I'm not even sure what I am going to do with this. But I guess it is a start.

I tried to draw something in under 10 minutes, and this would be the outcome.

I find it therapeutic - like writing and reading. I guess what I mean to say is that you might find posts about what I am drawing today. I know its not good enough, but I'm sort of starting out.

Catch you later, dudes!

Puzzle pieces

I guess I had forgotten how much I loved to write what was in my heart.

I guess I had forgotten that a blog is a journal - albeit online - and that journals are collections of thoughts, musings, findings, rants, raves, and basically an anthology of snippets.

I realize that whenever we take something we are passionate above and convert it into something you are forced to do, the inevitable burn out happens. Sucks when it does.

For me, its the road to writing from the heart.

Its living from the heart.

Its existing for who I am.

Puzzle pieces.

Our lives are filled with puzzle pieces, and its a gazillion or something jigsaw puzzle ready to be pieced together.

I pray none of us give up on this project.

Project: Me.

Photo swiped from BlogForProfit

!Silenced.

I've kept mum as of the past couple of days because of several things.

I do not know how to start things anymore, and I know not how the flow of information comes and goes in my mind.

But if anything the past couple of days has taught me is that our freedom of speech is integral and a gift that nobody should take away from us.

Recently, the Philippines' lawmakers passed a bill that is so full of loopholes that when worse comes to worse, even saying 'hehehe' on any social media site or even blogging can be reasons enough to land yourself in jail. It is a terrifying thought, especially for somebody with a motor mouth or somebody who spews ideas about everything and anything - like me.

And yet this idea prompts me to speak out instead.

It angers me that certain people wish to silence those who have opinions. It angers me that there is that law that makes people think twice about expressing.. or maybe just stop expressing at all. On top of that... some supposedly honorable Senator made it possible because he cannot take criticisms. 

May we never be silenced.

Image from BakitWhy.com

This Girl

So there is This Girl whom I am so jealous of.

I think my jealousy of her started when my sister said that her 'Ate' (This Girl) is perfect beyond compare, and that I should be like her, especially since This Girl is so... girly.

At first I just brushed it off, telling my sister that its just too bad that she could not replace me with the sister she wants. But deep down, it hurt. Thus began my jealousy of This Girl.

We met, of course, and she's nice. Which makes me jealous even more. Isn't that how it goes?

This Girl is probably around my age with one adorable kid. 'Good for her', I say. And I mean it from the bottom of my heart. But that does not keep me from being jealous... let me count the ways.

She's pretty.

She's sexy (which my sister keeps repeating and repeating).

She's a cool mom.

She's hip and trendy. And,

She's the sister my sister wants.

I'm a mom, too! But maybe I'm not a cool mom. I don't let my children drink coffee, or play with gadgets and gizmos aplenty. I am not sexy, not even near curvaceous - just plain old fat. And I am definitely not hip nor trendy - bordering along the lines of weird and eclectic. I am not pretty, too. And most of all, I guess my sister does not want me to be her sister.

The last one hurts like hell.

I've got to hand it over to This Girl, even I cannot hate her. I try not to hate people anyway... especially since she is nice. I think. I am just jealous. I just wanted to get that out in the open.

But if I were asked if I would change to be like her - because I am so jealous of her - then I would say, NO.

Why?

Even though I am not a cool mom, I stand by my decision to allow/teach my children to read books, do arts and crafts, listen to music without headphones on, and just play in the sun. I still prefer to create cardboard box houses with them, and so on. As jealous as I am with This Girl, I think I will stick to my goofy self and just maybe admire how cool she is - as best as I can! LOL

I try not to be jealous with This Girl. Really. Jealousy is baaaaaaaaaad.

I swear, I have tried everything I could think of to make myself feel better, but it just is not working.

*le sigh* Well, I just wanted to say that out loud. :) Hehe

Cheers.

** This post was written 3 days ago, but I am so lazy/busy/lame these days. C'est la vie!

DQ (Dairy Queen) mode

Some days I am content to just eat my packed lunch and wait for the rest of my lunch break to pass by. I eat like the wind, you see, and even when I try to eat slowly, time does crawl by when you are eating alone.

Last Friday, I had this intense craving for ice cream, so I asked one of my Khmer colleagues if she would like to step out onto the blistering heat and enjoy ice cream as well. My friend was feeling rather low as well, and incidentally had a craving for pints, nay gallons, of ice cream and so she agreed.

I suggested that we head over to the Dairy Queen shop along Riverside, which was recently opened, and although she was hesitant at first, I managed to get her to try something new.

After some adventure with myself attempting to drive a scooter, we reached Dairy Queen shop and stepped into the cool shop. The selections were not much, but it was enough. I was curious enough about the Blizzard ice cream, so I ordered the Chocolate Xtreme Blizzard. My friend, on the other hand got something else with bananas and apples. Unfortunately, I was too excited about my ice cream to care what she had. We even had a small Oreo Blizzard cup for free!

Dairy Queen has this test with Blizzard that before it is served, it is held upside down and the ice cream should not fall off. If it does, I think you get ice cream for free.

So the dude giving us our ice cream upturned our Blizzards and I was amazed at how the ice cream did not fall off!!

Kewl.

Overall, I had a blast that day. It satisfied my hankering, cooled off my friend's depression, and we had a cool lunch break.

I hope to return to DQ again sometime. When the time is right. ;)

**The Dairy Queen ice cream shop is located along Riverside (Preah Sisowath Quay) next to Pizza Company.